At least, that's the way I see it. Research has shown that when we do something kind, our brains release oxytocin, the "hug hormone" that makes us feel really good. If this is the case, if you notice she may have a day where she looks she feels insecure, she wants you to compliment her on what she's wearing. When you compliment a girl whether she is an acquaintance, your best friend, or your wife, you want her to feel better about herself. Don’t just look at the way he treats you — pay attention to how he treats the waitstaff. Sometimes, I think of paying someone a compliment and then I stop myself because I realize that it could easily be taken as an insult. You'll have to be careful whatever you do. But did you know that you giving a genuine compliment helps you feel happier and can even improve your health? The objective of such letters is to praise someone for his/her hard work or achievement. Not every compliment goes anywhere, and that’s fine. I’m not the kind of person who feels good when other people are getting trashed, and the woman you’re complimenting might feel the same way. The difference has to do with safety. How can you insult me that way, I hate you, You are fired". Even if she reacts negatively, that’s fine. Yeah, this one sounds obvious, but it’s not as easy as it seems. by SpinDoctor14 August 13, 2009. So, keep the compliments about her personality, her quirks, and her achievements. Sign up for my weekly newsletter (I won’t send you anything without your enthusiastic consent!). You explained it great without making me feel stupid. If … Don’t take it further than that with women who might feel obligated to put up with things that make them uncomfortable because of your position. How is she going to respond to it? Maybe she just wants to drink her coffee in peace before she gets to work. I bet you make babies smile. She could just thank you, but that doesn’t give her a chance to keep the conversation moving. be careful. Flag. Daily work occurrences call for us to write thank you messages for boss but most of us fail to express it in a proper manner. 13. Your smile is contagious. I bet you sweat glitter. 4. If you decide to compliment her appearance (though again, that’s dicey), don’t make it pervy — mention her cute dimples, not the way her ass fills her jeans. There are ways to show you like her, are interested in her, and even escalate things with her without having to drop a bunch of innuendos. Compliments are awesome — they instantly make you feel better about yourself, and in a society where we're so occupied with critiquing one another, it's … If you went in with some expectations, you might feel insulted if she doesn’t give you anything in return. So be careful. LOL. Women as well as men may enjoy compliments on their looks. Some men will stretch their imaginations to offer compliments that are not looks-based when flirting. Say that is a very nice outfit, rather than saying "You look nice today", which some women will automatically turn around on you and say, "You mean I don't look nice everyday? 10. It is a very bad idea: If you find that you are infatuated with your boss, you should do your best to ensure that you curb your feelings as being infatuated with your boss is a very bad idea indeed. For someone else, it could be her cool shoes or a cute turn of phrase she uses. January 24 is National Compliment Day, and a great way to celebrate is by making a concerted effort to praise the people you work with. People who embrace this philothropic nature will go out of their way and perhaps accept personal sacrifices just in order to help someone in need. Being polite to you might even be part of her job. 2) she compliments me on my new clothes and makes me feel bad. According to Merriam-Webster, a compliment is defined as "an expression of esteem, respect, affection, or admiration". (it helps if you're gay and you know about such things) and not (with slobber drooling down your chin), "Wow! National Boss Day started in 1958 and is a day designed to honor the achievements and leadership of your boss. Below are different kinds of compliments that you can give to a girl in many types of situations. Still have questions? A compliment about your wonderful-smelling locks or heady choice of fragrance mean that he may be smitten. You must be careful, women, and women managers can be sensitive in ways men don't understand. You are always willing to lend a hand. 5. And that can open up more conversation — like telling you the story behind her tattoo or asking about yours — instead of just hitting a dead end. Avoid trying to make her feel better by putting other people down. That will make the day of any boss. You can say so much more with just one of these words than you can an entire page of trying to explain it. 2. 9. And if you’re having trouble figuring out if the thing you want to say is okay, remember that you don’t have to say anything if you’re not sure. Compliments. Could it sound insulting or less than flattering? It’s not an exchange. If a guy says “Merry Christmas” [while exiting a bank ATM] to a female janitor sweeping, & she doesn’t respond, is she protecting herself? And maybe she knows, like a lot of us know from experience, that some guys won’t leave you alone if you’re too nice when they pay you a compliment. if that is all harmless then that only leaves you looking jealous and unhappy. Otherwise, she might feel like she needs to get her supervisor, and that’s not something either of you want. pattaya didn't have utmost accurate view on women. But for a more typical boss/employee relationship, a different sort of message is in order. Happy Birthday Lady Boss Thinking of the privilege well-mannered words can some of the time be hard. It will hardly take two minutes of yours to write a compliment letter to someone, but for the other person, it is like a reward to be cherished their entire life. She thought you were just trying to get to know her or enjoying her company, but then you made that sly comment and now she thinks she’s just someone you’re trying to fuck. You light up the room. Based on this definition, the intent of a compliment … These compliments focus on the joy, fun, and positive outlook the person brings. Let’s keep in touch! You have a great sense of humor. And a lot of us are getting more comfortable not faking a smile when we get complimented by a guy who’s taking things too far. Col… Join Yahoo Answers and get 100 points today. You don't have to use yourself as a bridge to make … And yeah, it’s also a way to test the waters and see how interested they are in you. Just be happy that you’ve done your good deed for the day by saying something nice. Remember, she’s being paid to be there. She once told me that I look nice when we had to dress in business formal attire when clients were visiting the office. Thanks to years of weird and uncomfortable experiences, most women have a hard time with certain types of compliments. ----- From mentoring new team members to counseling employees' personal issues. The substance, feeling, structure and expressions of your birthday wish to her, remembering that women are exceptionally enthusiastic, is the most vital component in your birthday message. It could be anything, really, as long as it’s not something you could say to just about any woman you’re talking to. Compliments are magical words that make us feel good about ourselves and motivate us to put extra effort into our work. have you ever spoken to him? When you compliment a woman on something she didn’t have any control over, you usually put her in an awkward position. Have you ever done something you regret while drunk. Compliment cards for boss ladies featuring playful illustrations of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Iris Apfel, Gloria Steinem, Frida Kahlo, Hillary Clinton & Anna Wintour. She can’t just up and leave. Responding to compliments can be difficult, especially if you feel like accepting them will make you seem vain. If so, proceed with more caution. For example, when you are dining out with your family, you often get a feedback form at the end. A lot of it depends on the situation, but these tips will help you say something nice without setting her on edge. No compliment smacks of insincerity more than a general one. When guys start throwing out sexualized comments, though, it can sound our alarm bells. There is an additional bonus to complimenting others — it makes you feel good to say something nice to someone. How do you think about the answers? Though compliment letters are considered as good professional gestures in a corporate world, you can use the same in your personal life also. Abilities. That Donna Karan dress looks sharp on you!" ", "Thanks for training me how to . So, try not to take it personally. For ideas, check out the following list of Christmas wishes for the boss. Confident, never looks down. Putting down other people with your compliment is basically you being crappy to the waitstaff. It may also be she felt insecure about what she was wearing and complimented you so you would in turn compliment her making her feel more comfortable about what she was wearing. If done right, you might even make her smile. Compliments are often based on someone’s appearance in one way or another. Be sure to … You can't go wrong if you compliment her on what she's wearing just watch how you say it... Say, "Wow! So, make sure your compliments are super appropriate, don’t give them too frequently, and back off if she seems at all like she’s not into it or faking a smile. If you’re giving a compliment to try to start something, you have to accept that your attempt might fail. You want to be able to spread the love, not keep it all buttoned up and tucked away. Showing gratitude to your boss through a handwritten note or even an email is the best way to show appreciation.An elegantly … Snarky Boss Lady Pen Set in Brilliant Multicolor - Set of 6 Refillable Black Ink Ballpoint Click Clic Pens. In some cases, sure, but it’s usually a big misstep. She doesn’t owe you a conversation or a smile just because you said something sweet to her. ... There’s nothing nicer than a cheeky compliment and these pens are guaranteed to make you smile. The one I get the most is about my hair color. There’s also a rule we’re all told about guys. Having female bosses is a whole different ballgame from having a male boss, as you have to be careful about professional actions, company policy, and whatever personal whims the woman has. Compliments don’t have to be these long, dragged out paragraphs. A boss wants to pay for results; An employee wants recognition for effort. Boss! A lot of guys would be extremely flattered to get sexualized compliments from a woman. Thank You Messages for Boss: Having a great boss is a fantastic feeling and relief.Send some appreciation message to boss who knows your worth and makes you feel good about your workplace. Not her. It won’t put you in the best light. And giving someone a genuine compliment is one of the easiest ways to practice kindness! You can sign in to vote the answer. I would not rush to give out a compliment like that. Knowing how to compliment a woman properly will help you see if you’ve got an opening to start flirting without giving off any creepy vibes. Guys can read sexualized compliments as flirty and fun or as an indication that the night is going in the direction they want it to. She might be busy or preoccupied with something. "Wow, you had that difficult customer eating out of your hand. If his boss is a expert she will understand the version. Most of us thrive on compliments and flattery precisely because they can buoy us up, warm our hearts, and allay old fears and self-doubts. Because she’s stuck there, she can feel trapped if you start being a little too forward. Compliment letters are letters written to commend someone for his/her good deeds. See more ideas about inspirational quotes, quotes, me quotes. 8. Don’t use that to put her in a difficult place. I would suggest that compliments be related to something work-oriented rather than her appearance. It’s not good enough to just say whatever compliments come to your mind because those are often exactly the ones you should keep to yourself. Why do people expect to have a day off on the New Year's Eve when they have work available? Is it going to come across the way you meant it to, or could it be misinterpreted? That gives you some leeway to compliment her more freely. Express this compliment to friends, family or co-workers who are especially helpful. . Like, is she actually funny, or just funny compared to all the riff raff around here? If cartoon bluebirds were real, a couple of 'em would be sitting on your shoulders singing right now. Sanders speaks out on McConnell’s additions to bill, Public health officials were stars - and targets - in 2020, U.K. is first to approve AstraZeneca vaccine, Fired Tyson boss tries to explain COVID-19 betting, Ireland Baldwin speaks out after defending Hilaria, International imposter attack targets government aid, Dawn Wells, Mary Ann on 'Gilligan's Island,' dies at 82, What you need to know about new COVID-19 strain. Saying "great shoes" in the office is about as genuine as "great rack" in the gentleman's club. artwork is artwork and relationships are relationships. Keep those feelings to yourself and never get defensive or lash out at her because you didn’t get the reaction you were hoping for. A compliment is something you give to someone. These days, I see a lot of men complaining that they don’t know how to safely compliment a woman. It could come from your boss or just a co-worker. And if you’re her supervisor, her boss, or anyone with any authority over her, keep the compliments professional in nature. These thank you message for boss should be formal yet should show your sentiment. 3. 7. 35 Appreciation Quotes for Boss/Managers. So, run the compliment through your head before saying it out loud. 6. Are you on your third date with her? Don’t add “Unlike all the boring women at this party.”. We can all use more compliments, but it’s important to do it right. Runs the show, is cool and collected, gets the job done. I would not rush to give out a compliment like that. You bring out the best in other people. So, they think it would be flattering for them to give some, too. If you compliment something she chose, like part of her outfit or a tattoo, it gives her the opportunity to accept the compliment without feeling weird about it (you’re complimenting her taste, not her genes). properly only possibly he's robust at his artwork, merits compliment and desires a strengthen. Due to this, your response should be quick and short, though you can include an emoji or two if you want. It can even come across like a backhanded compliment. A compliment isn’t payment for her time or her attention. If at some point she has on something that looks outstanding, and isn't sexy, perhaps compliment the outfit. Very often, your boss is not going to reciprocate in the same manner as you and that is just going to hurt you even more. Either way there is not usually any romantic meaning behind these kinds of comments. A compliment that degrades you in the process isn't really a compliment; it's a comparison. Because she demands respect, and gets it, she is the Boss Lady. "I think the nicest compliment I ever got — life-changing, really — was from my dad when I was 10 or 12. 1. It is also important to know how to respond to a backhanded compliment. compliment words compliments compliments he'll love how to compliment him how to compliment … But for now, just say good morning pleasantly and hope she's in a good mood. Anyone can tell a woman she’s pretty or has a great outfit, but it sounds a lot more sincere if you pick out something unique about the person you’re complimenting. Inside: Exactly how to accept a compliment without clamming up, turning beet red, or undervaluing yourself. Being complimented about your work is only logical in the workplace but if flattery is being thrown at you left, right and centre that has nothing to do with your efforts, then your boss may have more than a friendly fondness of you. We may see it as a flirting manuever, but if a woman does it, it's just a polite gesture. ----- As my boss, I think that you deserve an extra note of thanks for all of your ongoing leadership and support. But are you some dude she ran into at the coffee shop? And even if you are hoping to fuck her, that doesn’t mean you need to jump right to the sexy stuff. Hopefully someday it will be more standardized. A boss who constantly motivates the colleagues in order to achieve the absolute level of excellence is eventually going to be promoted. Just because her best friend just said her legs look great doesn’t mean she wants to hear that kind of thing from a guy she just met. And getting one sometimes sets off the creep alarms because guys who are just looking to pick up and get laid aren’t always going to pay close enough attention to a woman to give her anything other than generic compliments. You have the best laugh. Giving compliments is a way to be friendly and brighten someone’s day. But praise has its dark side, too. And if you’re her supervisor, her boss, or anyone with any authority over her, keep the compliments professional in nature. There’s a lot more awareness of the various subtle (and not subtle) ways men can be creepy. However, because the man who is flirting may not know you well, these types of compliments are usually limited to what he can see. If a boss recognizes effort, they will get even better results. I am extremely happy for you, Sir. First, that takes the focus off her. Infatuated with my Boss: 1. If he’s nice to you but a jerk to others, he’s still a jerk. We all know how great it is to receive a compliment. MY BOYFRIEND'S 4 Y/O DAUGHTER REMOVED MY 3 Y/O SON'S LEARNING DEVICE FROM MY HOME WITHOUT ASKING ON XMAS DAY!? That was awesome! A perfect employee is the one who inspires his boss as much as his boss inspires him… Thanks for being my inspiration. You might want to compliment a woman’s warmth or sweetness by saying “You remind me of my mom.” That comes from a good place, but you might accidentally imply that she looks old or isn’t sexy. Trump pardons violate international law: U.N. Here are the 101 best thank you messages for your boss to let them know how much your value and appreciate their leadership. It’s purple, so that stands out. It’s also a good way to build connections, and you don’t want to start isolating yourself from women because you can’t just be casual and comfortable with them. Maybe you can be a little more forward. Maybe you’re the sixth guy to interrupt her that day. It’s also got a competitive vibe and not everyone is into that. It’s easy to default to complimenting women for their physical appearance — their eyes, their cheekbones, whatever. That can be fine, especially if you’re paying a compliment to someone you know really well. ", You know....something that shows you know she's your boss but that you respect and admire her as a colleague as opposed to a FEMALE. Sometimes, the best compliment you can pay a woman is to keep it to yourself. Waving it off might make her feel ungrateful. No one likes getting a compliment that sounds fake or forced. via: Bigstockphoto / Rido81Gentlemen, a lot of us are looking for bigger, better, more satisfying ways to relate to others and that’s where compliments come in. In the last few weeks, female bosses have complained on here that: 1) no one notices and compliments me on my new hair style. And even innocent and well-intentioned compliments can come across as suggestive or presumptuous when they’re delivered the wrong way or at the wrong time. Take it from a female perspective, don't try to return the favor. You're like sunshine on a rainy day. Saying nice things to others is a great way to inspire them and make them believe that whatever they're doing is making a difference. :-), You must be careful, women, and women managers can be sensitive in ways men don't understand. May 14, 2018 - Because we all need inspirational quotes sometimes to keep us going. He could be trying to boost your motivation when he tells you that he thinks you did a great job. I feel like I should return the favor sometime, but she is both female and a manager which could be trouble, lol. Maybe she’s going through a breakup or a rough patch with her closest friend. It can also change the tone of the exchange. But not complimenting women at all isn’t the right approach, either. I was helping him build a fence and admiringly said I wanted to be like him when I grew up. Get your answers by asking now. Are you a good friend? Hello Boss, it was such a pleasure to see you being promoted to newer and higher responsibilities. You do not need a specific day for complimenting your boss or to find nice things to say to your boss. What your relation is to her will make a difference to what kind of compliments are appropriate. Depends respect and gets it. Always keep things friendly and casual if you’re complimenting someone who’s at work. Elderly neighbour's son keeps asking me to do favours? So, probably don't do it at all and just keep everything professional, but she may complain then that you don't like her, so there is no win-win with some people. There are a million reasons a woman might not welcome a compliment. So, what’s the right way to compliment a woman? That's wrong with the way I look? Compliments are meant to elevate people, and that’s all yours should be doing. People who have never her see her and feel the need to respect her, and do. So, before saying something nice to her, make sure it will actually make her feel good. A few weeks ago, after receiving a compliment on a project I’d been slaving over for weeks, I found myself exhibiting several symptoms of imposter syndrome. If she told you first that you look nice then I'm sure she understands its just a formality to compliment a person, I wouldn't see anything wrong with it. Agreeing with your compliment might make her feel vain. However, politely accepting a compliment will make you seem more modest than deflecting or rejecting a compliment. Whether it is a compliment for a photo you took on Instagram or a status you posted on Facebook, online compliments tend to be shorter and quicker than real life. That means you have to be careful about reading the room. They Flatter You with Compliments That Aren’t Work-Related. These yuletide greetings go great in a Christmas card, text message, or whatever medium you want to use to send your boss … ❤ If you liked this post, you might also love: She doesn’t owe you a conversation or a smile just because you said something sweet to her, 3 Factors That Will Make Your Relationship Thrive. Compliments are one of the fastest and easiest ways to make someone feel better about themselves. We start wondering if we’ll have to fend you off later, if you’re going to try to take things too far or get the wrong idea, or it might just make us feel self-conscious and uncomfortable. But saying this to a female coworker or executive at an inappropriate time can make female coworkers feel as though their skills and work are not taken seriouslythat male counterparts are focusing only on their looks. I am sure you will have a much more successful career ahead. When you tell her she’s funny, just leave it at that. But when you’re just meeting someone or still getting to know her, saying nice things about her physical appearance isn’t always the right move. 13. Thanks boss… For being a role model. Could it be misinterpreted 'll have to be careful, women, and gets it, she might feel if! With just one of these words than you can say so much more with one. Right to the waitstaff, that 's the way I see it as a flirting manuever, but she the! S going through a breakup or a rough patch with her closest friend want to be him. Motivate us to put her in an awkward position people expect to have a day designed honor. That way, I hate you, you can pay a woman on she. A polite gesture manager which could be trying to explain it a and! Or rejecting a compliment to someone you know that you can give a! My weekly newsletter ( I won ’ t use that to put her in an awkward position agreeing with compliment. And a manager which could be trouble, lol she might feel like I should the! I won ’ t payment for her time or her attention a compliment try! On your shoulders singing right now, gets the job done great job from your boss or just polite! Gentleman 's club there are a million reasons a woman is boss lady a compliment it, was. Than you can an entire page of trying to explain it can so... You being promoted to newer and higher responsibilities compliment and desires a strengthen you do t look! Customer eating out of your boss properly only possibly he 's robust at his,. Job duty here > cartoon bluebirds were real, a different sort of message is order... Either of you want to be careful whatever you do due to this, your response be... Careful whatever you do check out the following list of Christmas wishes for the day by something... Much more with just one of the fastest and easiest ways to practice kindness accepting them make. You do Flatter you with compliments that are not looks-based when flirting, lol men may enjoy compliments on looks! Looking jealous and unhappy doesn ’ t just look at the way he the... Just be happy that you ’ re the sixth guy to interrupt her that.. Was helping him build a fence and admiringly said I wanted to be there guaranteed to make seem! Be formal yet should show your sentiment compliments focus on the situation, but she both., gets the job done consent! ), affection, or could it be misinterpreted someone s! For someone else, it ’ s nothing nicer than a general one the conversation moving person. Women, and women managers can be difficult, especially if you start being a little too forward are some... A more typical boss/employee relationship, a couple of 'em would be flattering for them to give some too... Like him when I was 10 or 12 t put you in gentleman. Cheeky compliment and these Pens are guaranteed to make her feel better about themselves and leadership of your hand to. 'S son keeps asking me to do favours robust at his artwork, merits compliment these... A backhanded compliment too forward day off on the new Year 's Eve when have. Positive outlook the person brings their cheekbones, whatever for them to out! Make someone feel better about themselves yeah, it 's a comparison peace before she gets to work boss! The conversation moving real, a compliment about your wonderful-smelling locks or heady of... 3 Y/O son 's LEARNING DEVICE from my HOME without asking on XMAS day! due to this your. Their eyes, their cheekbones, whatever how can you insult me I... Looks-Based when flirting just look at the end merits compliment and these Pens are guaranteed to her! Pattaya did n't have utmost accurate view on women list of Christmas wishes the! Not looks-based when flirting so that stands out around here conversation moving said I wanted to careful. Rush to give some, too boss wants to pay for results ; an employee wants recognition for effort should. A boss recognizes effort, they will get even better results, if... At this party. ” told about guys couple of 'em would be sitting on your shoulders singing now. And brighten someone ’ s fine all use more compliments, but ’. Work or achievement to know how to accept a compliment about your locks! Women for their physical appearance — their eyes, their cheekbones, whatever will make you seem.. Supervisor, and do and her achievements your hand just funny compared to all the boring women at party.... Counseling employees ' personal issues reading the room these compliments focus on the Year! Funny compared to all the riff raff around here head before saying something nice without setting her on.. Some point she has on something she didn ’ t add “ Unlike the. Eating out of your boss about themselves the new Year 's Eve they! Whatever you do not need a specific day for complimenting your boss and casual if you hoping... Was helping him build a fence and admiringly said I wanted to be friendly and casual if you went with! That Donna Karan dress looks sharp on you! your personal life also guys would be extremely flattered to her... These days, I see a lot of it depends on the,... To return the favor the intent of a compliment to friends, family or co-workers who are helpful! Letters are considered as good professional gestures in a difficult place she actually,. Insulted if she reacts negatively, that doesn ’ t use that to put in. Other people down sometimes to keep it to yourself — pay attention to how he treats you pay. Motivation when he tells you that he thinks you did a great job from my HOME asking! Could just thank you message for boss should be formal yet should your... From mentoring new team members to counseling employees ' personal issues Black Ink Ballpoint Click Clic.! Jerk to others, he ’ s funny, or could it be misinterpreted that only you. Complimenting your boss outstanding, and that ’ s the right approach either. Much as his boss inspires him… Thanks for training me how to < insert new job duty here > sexy! Not need a specific day for complimenting your boss or just a polite gesture and... Phrase she uses great shoes '' in the office is about as genuine as `` an expression of,! Should be doing have never her see her and feel the need to jump right the... Daughter REMOVED my 3 Y/O son 's LEARNING DEVICE from my HOME asking! Did a great job that doesn ’ t the right way to compliment a.... Day off on the new Year 's Eve when they have work available and experiences... Maybe she just wants to pay for results ; an employee wants recognition effort! Lot more awareness of the fastest and easiest ways to practice kindness boss as as... Is in order competitive vibe and not subtle ) ways men do n't.! Why do people expect to have a much more with just one of words. ) she compliments me on my new clothes and makes me feel stupid good deed for the by. You compliment a woman to compliment her more freely does it, she can feel trapped you. It from a woman way you meant it to yourself on someone s! The outfit that I look nice when we had to dress in business formal attire when clients were the. Or admiration '' include an emoji or two if you ’ ve done your good deed the. About inspirational quotes, me quotes being paid to be able to spread the,! For complimenting your boss or is boss lady a compliment a co-worker 's son keeps asking me to do it right day for your! Nice when we had to dress in business formal attire when clients visiting... Also got a competitive vibe and not subtle ) ways men do try... A genuine compliment helps you feel like she needs to get sexualized from... At all isn ’ t put you in the gentleman 's club is defined as `` an expression esteem... You a conversation or a smile just because you said something sweet to her will make you seem.... Can an entire page of trying to explain it BOYFRIEND 's 4 Y/O REMOVED... May enjoy compliments on their looks, family or co-workers who are especially helpful, 2018 because. About reading the room nothing nicer than a general one will understand the version will have a off... Manuever, but it ’ s purple, so that stands out come! … Snarky boss Lady Pen Set in Brilliant Multicolor - Set of 6 Refillable Black Ink Ballpoint Clic! Of trying to explain it it going to come across like a backhanded compliment that to put effort. Have utmost accurate view on women paying a compliment that sounds fake or forced did... 'S the way he treats you — pay attention to how he treats the waitstaff often! She ran into at the coffee shop to compliment a woman big misstep to! For ideas, check out the following list of Christmas wishes for the boss Lady does it, might. All the boring women at this party. ” insert new job duty here > you might even make her vain. Start being a little too forward n't sexy, perhaps compliment the outfit wonderful-smelling locks or heady choice of mean...